It still exists, but finding it can turn into an outright quest. It really has perfected its hiding skills over the years. It'll do just about anything to avoid work, and more still: to avoid being stolen. In some places, it ended up in the wardrobe, somewhere between the spare pillow and extra woollen blanket. Elsewhere, it was stowed away half-concealed under a top-up pack of Kleenex in the bottom drawer under the washbasin in the hotel's bathroom. Here and there, I've discovered it cowering in one of the nightstand drawers, hugging the rear wall. The larger, the more beautiful, the more stable, metal and polished it was, the better it was hidden. It is the hotel hairdryer. Only rarely was it where it should have been: on a hook in the bathroom wall for quick access.
Recently in one particular hotel, I didn't have to spend long looking for it. Elegantly cushioned on dark red felt, the magnificent silver-and-black piece was lying in the single bathroom drawer. It was downright begging me to use it. I reached for it and was almost sucked into the drawer. The hairdryer seemed to be pulling on me instead of the other way around. Its cable was very short, very thick and very firm. It was twisted in spirals the way landline phone cables used to be. It was especially powerful. The worst thing about it was the way it had been routed through a hole drilled in the back of the drawer and attached to the wall behind it. This had a twofold effect. Firstly, the only way to steal this hairdryer would have been to destroy either it, or the drawer. Secondly, it made it truly impossible to use for its intended purpose. What good is an electrical hot-air blower just two and a half inches above the marble top of the washbasin?
In any case, this was the first hairdryer that had me on my knees. It really was the only way to use it.
But I’m lucky. The awkward morning genuflection before the hairdryer and drawer was over rather quickly. That's a pleasant side effect of the fact that two thirds of the hair I once had has already emigrated from my head. It saves time and apparently improves orthopaedic comfort in the hospitality sector.
It's just that my general observations in hotels and on aeroplanes tell me that people with a lot more of a hairstyle than I have, travel too. They may even need to blow-dry their hair at some point.
It's simple. If you attach the hairdryer so that it’s theft-proof, give it a long enough leash – or place it where it can actually be used. This is the case in 97% of all hotels anyway. The other 3% should call in their in-house technician right away.
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For example, you can now determine the distance to the city centre, the facilities of the various rooms or even which activities can be taken part in your hotel. With over 120 options to choose from, you can convince holidaymakers of the merits of your hotel. Of course, the hotel hairdryer should not be missing either.